You Should Not Be Allowed to Use Computers Anymore If...

• Cannot follow illustrated directions.
• Think the "www" is a required part of any web address.
• Refer to your computer as "the CPU" or "the hard drive."
• Don't understand the difference between a mail server and a web server.
• Think "the web" and "the Internet" are synonyms.
• Don't know the difference between a local drive and a mapped network share.
• Can't fathom why a CD will work in a DVD drive but a DVD won't work in a CD drive.
• Use the letter "U" in place of the word "you" in any context other than text-messaging on a phone that does not have a QWERTY keyboard.
• Cannot use the shift key.
• Use spaces to line up text in a $350 word processing program running on a $2000+ computer with more computational power than all of NASA at the time of the moon landing, especially if you have "Microsoft Word" as a skill on your résumé.
• Have never, and can't imagine ever, using your computer for anything other e-mail, instant messaging, word processing, making presentations, playing games, listening to music, playing videos and web surfing (or a subset of these.)
• Think that you *need* PowerPoint... at all... ever.

I'm sure I could think of a few more, but it's getting late.